by Dér Stépanos Dingilian, Ph. D. ©
2002
Attaining the Christian living of peace is a challenging and yet
inescapable spiritual step in life. There are at least three steps in attaining
this peace – a coherent peace which is experienced internally as well as
observed externally.
Peace with God -
First,
there is a need to establish peace with God. Bringing this about requires for us
to believe, understand, and trust God’s presence in our life. It means that we
need to recognize that God is with us, and that God wants the best or us – He
is the Compassionate Father. A belief short of this does not allow us to have
inner peace, no matter how hard we try to look at peace externally. We also need
to trust that not only can God guide and strengthen our life, but those around
us, and in fact the whole of humanity. This is a big order – to trust God in
all aspects of our life. Yet, once we attain this level of trust in God, it is
then that we realize that there is order to our life and society, that the world
is not that chaotic after all, and that all experiences turn out for the best
for us as St. Paul asserts. When we attain this trust in God, it is then that
instead of sensing that God is punishing us, we realize that He loves us and is
guiding us. No longer do we constantly need others’ affirmation that God loves
us. The peace we sense when this takes place cannot be described by words.
Peace with Oneself
- Second, when we
sense this peace with God, gradually our inner life starts becoming orderly as
well. We no longer sense that we are persecuted or that we are born losers.
Instead, we have a sense that we belong – belong to God, belong to life, and
in turn life belongs to us. This is a tremendously uplifting experience: To be
at peace with oneself. This does not mean we like everything about us, nor does
it mean that we become content with our shortcomings and stop growing in life.
Instead, it means that we learn to see ourselves objectively, as we are, neither
exaggerating our capabilities or shortcomings, nor downplaying them. Instead,
looking at ourselves directly and facing up to who we are – for better and for
worse.
Peace with Others - Third, when we
can trust God and our own person, then and only then are we ready to trust
others. We do not know how others will respond to us, but we know how we can
respond to them . . . or at least have a better grasp of our response. Yet, our
response to others depends very much on our trust of God and our trust of our
very own person. Therefore, when we trust God and our own person, we feel more
at ease when we converse and dialogue with others because; we can handle and
respond appropriately to whatever expression or action others convey to us. Our
person, emotions, and thinking is not continuously “jerked” from one
direction to another. We do not feel as though our feelings and moods are riding
on a roller coaster. Consequently, relating to others becomes more inviting and
enjoyable, instead of stressful, chaotic, and full of anxiety.
Peace leading to Happiness - In summation then, the sense of peace is instilled within us because we know that God is protecting and guiding us. We are also aware of our strengths and vulnerabilities and therefore are at peace because we know how we will respond to situations. Finally, we gain a sense of peace because we know that we can face any person and relationship knowing that the best for us and for all will come forth from it. When we have such peace within us, no matter how frightening or violent the world maybe around us, we are still able to maintain that sense of peace. With this sense of peace within us, we can also begin to look for joy and happiness in life because arguments are defused, frustrations are minimized, and hurtful feelings and statements are healed.