Joyous Expressions of Grandparents

Regarding their Grandchildren

"Grandchildren are much sweeter and delightful than your own children. Why? I suppose for a number of reasons. First, I think because you better understand life and you don’t worry as much when you see something. When you are a parent of a young child, you make sure that everything is well with him. If it is not, you worry. As a grandparent, you become more relaxed about small things and you realize that those things happened to your children as well, and they turned out alright. So when you don’t worry as much, you get to enjoy the little one a great deal more. Second, I think because as I get older, I appreciate and comprehend life a great deal more. So when I see the sincere and wholehearted play and joy of my grandson, it is like seeing the essence and the totality of life in front of my very own eyes. I guess I don’t know how to express it except by saying: ‘Look at him – this is life!’"

"My grandson makes a great deal of difference in our family, and likely others do for their families. First, he brings enthusiasm, energetic movement and dynamism into the family. When he is playing, you cannot help but get caught up with him in his play. He comes to you, forces you to play with him. Even if you are down or worried, or even have aches and pains, you somehow forget about all those and get caught up with him and his play. It is as though you are energized through his energy. Second, he does all sorts of unexpected things. As adults, we are very predictable. But children, especially young ones, see life from a completely different perspective. At one moment he would be saying something like an adult, and at another moment he would say something completely unpredictable. It makes me think how much we as adults may be missing in life because we have become set in our ways. Also I see something else in the unpredictability of my grandson: The miracles that God works in our lives! Again, as adults we often become so insightful and so predicting that we ignore the ways that God can deal with situations as we humans cannot. For example, when my grandson was young, he loved my son, his uncle, and whenever he came to our home he would look for him. So one day he came, he began calling his name in his own private language. When he did not see my son because he was out running an errand, he grabbed my son’s picture and begun hugging and kissing it. That is a miracle to me because it is totally unexpected: He has so much love, so much desire to express that love and he found a way to do it!"

"I think you also see a great deal more in your grandchildren. You’ve raised your children so you recognize the trends and expressions in them. You begin observing your grandchildren with greater insight and interest and discover behavior you did not notice in your children. It is like a whole book that opens in front of you. I don’t need entertainment. I am entertained just watching his interesting and energetic actions and expressions."

"Perhaps the most important message that I try to get across to my grandchildren is ‘respect.’ We have a saying: ‘The more you respect the other, the more you respect yourself.’ For example, I teach them respect by greeting them every time I see them. This contact is very important. In the same way, I also expect them to respect me too. When they see me, they need to set everything aside, come and greet me and then continue doing what they were doing. This teaches them the importance of respecting the other by acknowledging his or her presence. I think it also teaches them to be responsible. I show my responsibility towards them. But gradually they will have to begin showing and proving their responsibility towards their grandmother and I. They need to initiate the contact with us; show us that they care about us, even if it is through a phone call."

"I encourage the parents of my grandchildren first of all, to communicate with them. Children need to be able to trust their parents and converse with them openly. Second, in order to accomplish this, I encourage the parents to spend a great deal of time with them. There is no substitute for this. Third, I let them know that they need to help create and sculptor the child’s personality. I think it is imperative that they realize that although the child has capabilities, but it is the parents who will help this creativity take form and be expressed in a constructive manner. And fourth, since parenthood is so stressful these days, I try to encourage the parents to look at the young one’s personality and spiritual development. I tell them that the child will let you know if he is hungry or is cold. But the personality and spirituality is something that he cannot know for himself."

"I encourage my grandson to know his roots – his parents, family, extended family, nation and Church. It is like a tree: If it has healthy roots then it will grow fine. If not, you know the years ahead will be difficult ones."

"It is interesting that the person that comes to mind from the Bible that best describes a grandparent for me is Job. I think Job had a great deal of patience to understand, discuss and explain everything in the minutest detail. I think this is what a grandparent needs to do: Even if the parent cannot do it, the grandparent has to be able to set the time aside and do it. I believe this is something I can do for my grandson as no one else can – make my time available for him. This is my best investment as a grandparent!"

"I hope and pray that they will grow healthy – physically and spiritually. As we say, under the shadow of the Holy Cross and the protection of God, that they will have a healthy way of thinking with common sense. I also pray that they will not be lazy, but enjoy working hard in a wise manner. If a child is lazy, let me tell you, it is tough motivating him to work. I hope they will have this desire to excel within themselves and show it as they grow older. I think it is also important that a person develop good personality habits and traits from early childhood. Two such traits that I think can form a foundation for the others are honesty and sincerity. If a person is honest and sincere with others, with God and especially with own self, then I think he will succeed in every aspect of life."

"I hope my grandson will know and remember that ‘Grandma loved me and was devoted to me. She patiently gave her time to help raise me.’ You know, we often take for granted that a child has to learn everything – from chewing to drinking out of a cup to walking and potty training. All these take time, effort and patience. There are no shortcuts to these. Someone has to sacrifice his or her time. I want my Grandson to know and appreciate that I was involved in this process. I think he’ll be better for it as a person."

* * * * *

Home