Compiled by Dér Stépanos Dingilian, Ph. D. © 2003

    One often wonders ho couples have met. Below are some examples of how some Armenian men and women who are still married have met. For the sake of space, each situation is set in the form of a narrative by the spouses - 'H' for the husband and 'W' for the wife. For reasons of keeping the personalities anonymous details are somewhat modified. Interestingly, as information was being gathered, it became apparent that the same mode of meeting another could exist in Armenia or any other Diaspora setting such as the United States. So the exclamation: "That would not happen in this country!" does not hold true. Please note that these couples are still married. There maybe similar situations where the marriages have not worked out.

High school sweethearts, waited until we completed college

H. From high school I knew that we were right for each other.

W. But my dad insisted that I get my college degree. It wasn't as though my dad or I did not trust him. Rather dad thought and I agreed that in order to have a sense of self-respect I needed a good education.

M. This also gave me the opportunity to go elsewhere and get an education of my own so I could support the family later.

W. But being away did not keep him from coming, visiting and asking when we would marry. For four years he went back and forth asking.

M. Finally, the week after graduation, she said "Yes" and we were married soon afterwards.

W. Even though I did not develop the career for the degree I received from the university, but I am still glad that I finished college. I feel that I am capable in all areas of life.

M. Maybe all that waiting also strengthened our love.

* * * * *

Needed to get married and saw a young woman walking by

M. My mother was growing old, my brother had not married, so I knew that I should get married. I asked my mother to see if she can find a person for me. She looked all over, contacted numerous people, and we must have visited dozens of people. Finally I remembered that I had seen a young woman walking by our home with her friend. I asked mom to investigate who was.

W. When they asked me about him, I was neither enthused nor had anything against him. He looked like a kind, reasonable person, not too outgoing, but then neither condescending. He looked like he'd be a good family man. So I said OK.

M. We met, spoke, can't say we were in love, but I thought, and I think so did she, that she is as good of a person I'll get, and probably she though I am as good of a person that she will get.

W. He is right. It all made sense. We were married three weeks later.

* * * * *

Wrote to each other before we met

W. A professor visiting our university enjoyed how I represented the Armenian culture. Afterwards she asked if it would be OK for her to give my address to an Armenian student her husband knew at another university. I said "Sure," but I never thought anything would come out of it.

M. When I was given the address, I began writing to her as an Armenian student at another university. We wrote to each other for a couple of years, and we had neither seen nor spoken to each other. Like she said, we did not expect anything.

W. I noticed that his letters were simple, down to earth, about everyday activities. He did not try to impress me with all sorts of romantic language. My friends kept saying "Why don't you write something exciting even if it is not true just so you get his attention." I did not do it. I wanted to be sincere and genuine.

M. Actually her sincerity must have come through, because we kept writing for two years before we met. But once we met, we knew that we were for each other. It seemed that those two years of writing helped us get to know each other.

W. That's right. It seemed as though we had known each other for a long time. He proposed to me in less than one month.

M. Sure, when you meet a good person, you can't doubt or hesitate.

W. I told him I had to get my parents' permission, but I knew that they would approve.

(More on this topic will be found in the book 
"Sketches from the Armenian Family Life.")

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